Be An Asshole Today

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Chris Brogan blogged this morning about today being a day to be nice to someone, so I figured I’d take the contrarian view (sort of) and recommend that today, you be an asshole.

Specifically:

– commit today to no longer communicate or work with people who are poisonous to your well being. You know who they are – rumor mongers, gossips, backstabbers, energy vampires, and generally not nice people. No matter how may debts, markers, favors, or chits they owe you or you owe them, declare your entire relationship null and void, and get away from them. They’ll probably call you an asshole, but that’s life.

– commit today to defining what you will and will not stand for, in relationships, in life, in work. When someone or something tries to push that line, push back. Be firm and resolute about your choices, knowing that you’ve committed to your values. Some people will probably call you an asshole for no longer letting them walk all over you.

– commit today to no longer follow those persons and ideals who lead you nowhere. If your goal is success, why emulate the non-successful? Emulate, follow, and deeply study those people, ideals, and creeds who have achieved what you want to achieve in life. You may find yourself at odds, then, with those around you who have grown comfortable with who you are today, and not who you want to be – and yes, they’ll probably say you’ve become an asshole.

Obviously, you don’t have to be as blunt or direct as I’ve posted here, but if your goal is accomplishment – be it social good, profit, fame, fortune, salvation, whatever – make today the day you reaffirm your commitment to your goal of accomplishment, and begin to leave behind all the obstacles to that accomplishment.

Comments

26 responses to “Be An Asshole Today”

  1. Michael Bailey Avatar

    Thanks Christopher – I followed my own version of this sage advice around 6 years ago – lost 3 “friends” in the process and haven’t looked back since then.

    The road to accomplishment can be a lonely one at times (98%+) but you can bet your ass that you’ll never get there if you give up.

  2. C.C. Avatar

    I don’t even want to think what might have tripped this post off, but you are right on.

  3. Bob Goyetche Avatar

    Great post – If that’s being an asshole, I’ve been one for a while.

    Thanks for -> “If your goal is success, why emulate the non-successful?” – that one’s going to be in my head for a bit

  4. Christopher S. Penn Avatar

    C.C.: a very, VERY good seminar about mind science and meditation this past weekend. Lots of thinking about what makes for success, and why some people are or are not successful, however you define success.

  5. Steve Runner Avatar

    About 8 years ago, I followed this advice exactly, and I’m a much better person for it. I had a group of “friends” who were really dragging me down, and were fairly self-centered, completely non-supportive, and made it a point to ridicule my weight loss (70 lbs) and healthier lifestyle (I became a distance runner) on every occasion that we would meet (frequently). One day, I decided to declare my “entire relationship null and void” with this group of 20 or so “friends” (most of whom I had grown up with since elementary school days). It was a sad thing to do, but the best thing I could ever have done. I regret that they were who they were, but have no regrets for “being an asshole”.

  6. eaon pritchard Avatar

    wow, youve got me a fired up…shame its going home time GMT. i’ll read out loud to myself again in the morning.

  7. Kevin Kennedy-Spaien Avatar

    Synthesis: Today cut some dead wood out of your life. Politely.

  8. Clarence Avatar

    Is this the new wave of ’48 Laws of Power’?!? I dig the passion here, bruh. All of this really resonates with me today. ‘Preciate you sharin’ the clue you scored this weekend.

  9. john blue Avatar

    This made me laugh! It was a refreshing read. How come this directness never enters HBR like this 🙂

  10. john blue Avatar

    This made me laugh! It was a refreshing read. How come this directness never enters HBR like this 🙂

  11. Annette sandberg Avatar

    Totally agree. Of course us gals who set standards and boundaries are typically referred to as bitches.

  12. Annette sandberg Avatar

    Totally agree. Of course us gals who set standards and boundaries are typically referred to as bitches.

  13. Michael Bailey Avatar

    Thanks Christopher – I followed my own version of this sage advice around 6 years ago – lost 3 “friends” in the process and haven’t looked back since then.

    The road to accomplishment can be a lonely one at times (98%+) but you can bet your ass that you’ll never get there if you give up.

  14. Karen (aka MrsB) Avatar

    Point number 1 is precisely why I’ve always eaten lunch in my room (or gone out for a walk) and avoided the lunch room in every job I’ve had. I don’t wish to spend my time surrounded by negativity. I never know “the scoops” in the building but that suits me just fine. 🙂

  15. Karen (aka MrsB) Avatar

    Point number 1 is precisely why I’ve always eaten lunch in my room (or gone out for a walk) and avoided the lunch room in every job I’ve had. I don’t wish to spend my time surrounded by negativity. I never know “the scoops” in the building but that suits me just fine. 🙂

  16. C.C. Avatar

    I don’t even want to think what might have tripped this post off, but you are right on.

  17. BobGoyetche Avatar

    Great post – If that’s being an asshole, I’ve been one for a while.

    Thanks for -> “If your goal is success, why emulate the non-successful?” – that one’s going to be in my head for a bit

  18. Christopher S. Penn Avatar

    C.C.: a very, VERY good seminar about mind science and meditation this past weekend. Lots of thinking about what makes for success, and why some people are or are not successful, however you define success.

  19. Steve Runner Avatar

    About 8 years ago, I followed this advice exactly, and I’m a much better person for it. I had a group of “friends” who were really dragging me down, and were fairly self-centered, completely non-supportive, and made it a point to ridicule my weight loss (70 lbs) and healthier lifestyle (I became a distance runner) on every occasion that we would meet (frequently). One day, I decided to declare my “entire relationship null and void” with this group of 20 or so “friends” (most of whom I had grown up with since elementary school days). It was a sad thing to do, but the best thing I could ever have done. I regret that they were who they were, but have no regrets for “being an asshole”.

  20. eaon pritchard Avatar

    wow, youve got me a fired up…shame its going home time GMT. i’ll read out loud to myself again in the morning.

  21. Kevin Kennedy-Spaien Avatar

    Synthesis: Today cut some dead wood out of your life. Politely.

  22. Clarence Avatar

    Is this the new wave of ’48 Laws of Power’?!? I dig the passion here, bruh. All of this really resonates with me today. ‘Preciate you sharin’ the clue you scored this weekend.

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