Category: Marketing

  • Marketing Sucks

    Marketing Sucks

    Marketing sucks. That’s the perception that many, many consumers have about marketing, for good or ill. Here’s an example of what I mean. Richard Mondello, a high school senior in Dover Plains, New York, recently wrote on his blog:

    In my opinion, marketers will always be marketers. It’s their job to manipulate you into purchasing their product or service, and this isn’t arguable.

    This is depressing, mostly because Richard’s right. Decades of bad behavior, bad marketing, bad advertising, and general shortsightedness on the part of corporate marketing departments have blackened the profession’s name to the very people we want to reach.

    At every opportunity for new means of communicating, bad actors work as fast as possible to piss in the pool in the hopes that they’ll be able to scrape up a few meager commissions or sales before being consigned to the bin of perpetual ignorage by consumers in that channel.

    Don’t believe me? Here’s one of my favorite examples – Twitter is 18 months old and has tons of clueless marketers trying to garner attention every hour of every day. Not a single day goes by when I don’t get a follower notification from some asshat marketer whose Twitterstream is only pimpage.

    How did it all go wrong? Short term thinking, short term vision. When companies, organizations, or individuals focus only on the short term, whether it’s quarterly results on the Street or whether you can get some action at the single’s bar tonight, the same desperation is created by short term thinking. That combined with a profit above all else mentality has turned marketing into the corporate equivalent of that guy in the bar who smells of equal parts aggression, fear, and desperation – and the target audience stays far, far away.

    Marketing can be more than this. Marketing can be more than desperate selling or attention whoring. Marketing can be, at its ideal, the sharing of ideas, the promotion of ideas. One of my favorite quotes from Seth Godin is that marketing can kill people. Bad marketing has basically been responsible for things like genocide in Darfur or the war in Iraq because the ideas that would have led to the most favorable outcome were not marketed as well as the ideas that have led to current outcomes.

    So how do we get from desperate, lonely attention whoring (buy my product! digg my article! watch my video! pay attention to me!) to the ideal McMarketing outcome – billions and billions of lives saved? It really comes down to a change in our perception of what marketing is. Look at what the American Marketing Association says marketing is:

    Marketing is an organizational function and a set of processes for creating, communicating and delivering value to customers and for managing customer relationships in ways that benefit the organization and its stakeholders.

    Quick, close your eyes and try to remember that. I’d say marketing has a branding issue, wouldn’t you?

    Try this:

    Marketing is the sharing of ideas.

    The idea that college is affordable with the right solutions.
    The idea that a conference can be more than wooden panels and hotel food.
    The idea that a marketing podcast can inform and entertain.
    The idea that you can change your life for the better in an instant.

    We need to change our own belief system about marketing from corporate pimpage to the sharing of ideas, of knowledge, of insight. If you have a product or service that is unremarkable, that is not worth sharing, either change your product or create something on top of the product that is worth sharing. That’s been the basic idea behind the Financial Aid Podcast. Student loans – especially federal student loans – are commodity products. They’re fundamentally more or less the exact same thing, give or take a few minor details. So how do you make a commodity interesting? I couldn’t.

    But what I could do was create something else that was interesting – an internet radio show and new media initiative that changed how I thought about financial aid, and in turn helped others to change their ideas about financial aid. Instead of being a boring, obscure process that happened behind closed doors and in back room deals at conferences and golf courses, the Financial Aid Podcast has helped to bring at least part of the financial aid process out into the open, into the digital dialogue. It’s about sharing the ideas I’ve learned in financial aid with everyone and anyone who wants to listen and have a conversation about financial aid.

    Are my ideas any good? That’s for the audience to judge, but based on the results so far – thousands of listeners, thousands of friends on Twitter, LinkedIn, and other networks, coverage in US News & World Report, The New York Times, The Wall Street Journal, WCVB Boston 5 – I’d say that they’re at least worth talking about to some degree.

    If you’re a marketer, the very best thing you can do is to start figuring out what ideas you have that are worth sharing. Not products, not services, not pimpage, but actual ideas. If you work at a company that, frankly, has no ideas worth sharing, you either have to create them, or work for a different company.

    What are your ideas worth sharing?

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  • Snapple Antioxidant Water is a Soft Drink

    A few folks have been mentioning Snapple’s new soft drink, Snapple Antioxidant Water.

    “Wait, it’s water, it’s not a soft drink!” I can hear Marketing shouting.

    I beg to differ.

    Exhibit A: water.

    Ingredients: Water.

    Serving Size: 1 cup (240ml)
    Servings per Container: About 2.5
    Calories per serving: 0
    Total calories per bottle: 0
    Total Fat: 0g % Daily Value (Fat): 0%
    Sodium: 0 mg
    % Daily Value (Sodium): 0%
    Total Carb: 0 g
    % Daily Value (Total Carb): 0%
    Sugars: 0 g
    Protein: 0 g
    % Daily Value (Protein): 0%
    Niacin (B3): 0%
    Vitamin B6: 0%
    Vitamin B12: 0%
    Pantothenic Acid (B5): 0%
    Vitamin A: 0%
    Calcium: 0%
    Vitamin E: 0%
    Magnesium: 0%
    Zinc: 0%

    Exhibit B: Snapple’s drink.

    Ingredients: Purified water, sugar, potassium citrate (electrolyte), citric acid, natural flavors, fruit and vegetable juices (for color), modified corn starch, calcium lactate (electrolyte), calcium gluconate (electrolyte), magnesium lactate (electrolyte), vitamin E acetate, calcium disodium edta (to maintain freshness), grape seed extract, zinc gluconate (electrolyte), vitamin A palmitate, EGCG (epigallocatechin gallate), manganese gluconate (electrolyte).

    Serving Size: 1 cup (240ml)
    Servings per Container: About 2.5
    Calories per serving: 50
    Total calories per container: 125
    Total Fat: 0g % Daily Value (Fat): 0%
    Sodium: 0 mg
    % Daily Value (Sodium): 0%
    Total Carb: 12 g
    % Daily Value (Total Carb): 4%
    Sugars: 12 g
    Protein: 0 g
    % Daily Value (Protein): 0%
    Niacin (B3): 20%
    Vitamin B6: 20%
    Vitamin B12: 20%
    Pantothenic Acid (B5): 20%
    Vitamin A: 10%
    Calcium: 2%
    Vitamin E: 10%
    Magnesium: 2%
    Zinc: 2%

    Lots of stuff in Snapple’s drink that you won’t find in authentic water, including the 125 calories per bottle.

    Is it a good drink? That’s opinion. I haven’t tried it, so I can’t say. Is it water? Hell no. It’s got as many calories per bottle as a 12 ounce Guinness, a small soda, a 12 ounce orange juice, and infinitely more calories than unsweetened coffee, tea, or water. If you drink 5 bottles of water, at the end of the day, you will have consumed 0 calories. If you drink 5 bottles of Snapple, at the end of the day, you will have consumed 625 calories, or a Burger King Whopper (no mayo).

    What does this mean from a marketing perspective? By calling it water instead of a beverage, drink, etc. – pretty much anything that’s not water – it’s inherently misleading. People who drink it without reading the label and believe that it’s a substitute for water are in for a surprise, especially in their waistline. And Snapple’s not alone, not by any means. Sobe, I’m looking at you. Call it what it is – a soft drink. It may not be carbonated, and it may have more vitamins than a Diet Coke, but it’s still not a water substitute, and drinking it in lieu of water, if you’re thinking about health and weight control, will unpleasantly surprise you.

    Updated:

    Antioxidant water!I did some quick checking around. I found that another beverage, based on the marketing tactics above, can also be called antioxidant water!

    Yes, it’s true – with only 160 calories per bottle, plus healthy doses of polyphenols, as many health benefits as red wine, and the antioxidant ferulic acid, here’s my antioxidant water!

    Please consume antioxidant water responsibly.

    Fun experiment: of all the people who drink antioxidant beverages, how many could even explain what antioxidants are?

    Updated again:

    Snapple’s marketing agent is going to send me some of their antioxidant water for a taste test and review.  I plan on reviewing Snapple, tap water, bottled water, and beer.

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  • Learn to use the power of the Dark Side

    Learn to use the power of the Dark Side of the Force. Listen to the best marketing podcast ever produced in a doughnut shop with my friend and co-host John Wall. In this week’s episode, it’s a Google showdown between for-profits and non-profits, and why it will make your keyword costs go through the roof.

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  • Google out to bat for non-profits, hits home run

    Google announced a slew of products specifically tailored to non-profits two days ago.

    First, all their apps – Google Apps for Domains, etc. – are all free.

    Google Checkout transaction processing is free to non-profits until 2009.

    Here’s the game changer. Google Grants is an application process to qualify for free AdWords advertising. Where commercial organizations pay out the nose for top keywords, if your non-profit is a certified 501(c)(3) and is chosen as a Google Grants recipient, you can go head to head with corporate America for mission-critical keywords and spare your budget.

    This is big – very big. It will give non-profits access to huge audiences and resources without needing huge budgets, and the smaller the non-profit, the more benefit they’ll be able to get if chosen for the grant.

    Hats off to you, Google. You may be Big Brother, but at least you’re more or less benevolent.

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  • Starbucks is watching your every cup

    Today, Starbucks CEO Howard Schultz announced that they had acquired Coffee Equipment Company and its Clover system of coffee machines, single-serving cup makers that will let Starbucks customize your coffee for you.

    So what?

    The So What is this: Clover coffee machines are networked. They all speak to headquarters via CloverNet, and monitor EVERYTHING about your cup of coffee. From the web site:

    Know with CloverNet™, a service that gives you web access to your Clovers. Find out what’s brewing on each of your Clovers right now, and visualize business trends through real-time charting. CloverNet also makes it easy to update brew parameters for all of your coffees, and to keep your Clovers in peak operation through system monitoring.

    Starbucks doesn’t give a rat’s ass about the coffee – the machines are pure marketing wizardry, giving real time data flows to central command. This is what makes Clover and CEC a smart acquisition.

    Starbucks: Because Google shouldn’t have a lock on Big Brother.

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  • The Ever Watchful Eye of Google

    I cannot emphasize strongly enough how important it is to be mindful of Google’s watchful eye online. It is literally everywhere, and it does not forget. Everything you do under Google’s watchful eye impacts your personal brand and reputation. That drunken Twitter late at night? Google remembers. That blog rant composed at a conference? Google stores it forever. Here are just a few of the ways Google is watching you.

    • Google searches, indexes, and stores copies of every public web page, public forum, public discussion board, public email list it can find.
    • Google Orion monitors not just what you search for, but how you behave when you search, how long it takes you to locate things, and what you do when you find something.
    • Google News stores all of the news it can find in newspapers, radio, and television.
    • Google Alerts constantly scans news, blogs, and other items for selected key words that you, your friends, and your enemies deem important.
    • Google Feedburner stores all of the RSS feeds and other news feeds it can find – and who subscribes to them.
    • Google Reader tracks and stores all of the blogs you subscribe to and what items you deem important enough to share.
    • Google Maps provides geographic data and in return tracks exactly what you’re looking for and where on the earth it is.
    • Google Blog Search stores and remembers what you blog about on your personal blog.
    • Google AdWords watches what ads it shows and what ads you click on, how often, and when.
    • Google 411 stores how you pronounce words and uses its speech recognition to analyze non-text data.
    • Google YouTube tracks what videos you watch, share, promote, and enjoy.
    • Google Talk stores and searches what you discuss in instant messaging.
    • Google Desktop indexes and stores information about everything on your computer.
    • Google Transit watches where you go and how you get there.
    • Google Trends displays how information is monitored by end users over time.
    • Google Docs takes your office documents and indexes them and their contents.
    • Google personalized search stores every single question you ask Google, what answers you found important, and trends in your inquiries.
    • Google Pagerank algorithm tracks who links to web pages of yours and who you link to, diagramming out important nodes.
    • Google Android will bring these capabilities and monitoring powers to your phone.
    • Google OpenSocial will bring these capabilities to social networks like MySpace and Facebook.

    Mindfulness is absolutely imperative in the age of Google. Write, discuss, and share like the person you want to become, even if you aren’t that person today, because Google will remember you based on what you publicly create online. For forum moderators, mailing list managers, and community developers like myself, it is our obligation to create, manage, and moderate forums to be perceived by the general public in alignment with who we want to be, even if we as a community aren’t there just yet.

    Remember this quote from Mitch Joel: Your personal brand isn’t what you say it is. Your personal brand is what Google says it is.

    One good blog post lifts the entire community up in reputation, if only a little in Google’s massive knowledgebase. One bad post drags us all down. Everything matters – big or small.

    We are now, more than ever, interdependent on each other.

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  • Marketing Over Coffee is Oven Toasted Goodness

    This week’s Marketing Over Coffee (the best marketing podcast ever recorded in an oven toasted goods shop with co-host John Wall) features discussions of free, messaging failures, and other great fun. If you haven’t tuned in, head on over and get your cup of marketing.

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  • Optimize your LinkedIn Profile for SEO

    LinkedIn. Love it or hate it, it’s prominent, it’s a social network, and it lets you post URLs to your profile… except that they’re naked URLs, with no link text to help you in your search efforts, right?

    Nope.

    Now you can. Go to LinkedIn, make sure you have a public profile set up with a good URL, and then instead of choosing My Blog or My Company, choose Other.

    LinkedIn SEO

    Cha-ching! Link text in your profile from a prominent, trusted domain.

    Speaking of which, are we connected on LinkedIn? If not, connect here:

    View Christopher Penn 's profile on LinkedIn

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  • Dan Kennedy on Audio

    For those thinking about audio podcasting as an effective sales mechanism, master sales trainer Dan Kennedy has an interesting perspective on audio as a marketing tool. Granted, in his blog post, he’s talking about CDs and not digital delivery, but the points about why sales folks should be delivering audio as a sales mechanism are just as applicable.

    Read Dan Kennedy’s list here.

    If you’re looking for a sales podcast, check out the Sales Roundup Podcast, another one of our fellow New England Podcasters.

    I’ve been following a lot of Dan Kennedy’s stuff since I was introduced to it by one of my teachers, Dennis Mahoney. Dan costs a LOT for any kind of materials, but he delivers a lot of useful, out-of-the-box templates that work incredibly well. I use his sales letter template an awful lot when I send out promotional emails for the Financial Aid Podcast or Matthew Ebel.

    Combine it with systems like neurolinguistic programming and new media, and you’ve got a terrific combination.

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  • Don't be that guy… or gal… doing blogger outreach.

    I got a promotional email from Big Machine Media today cc’ed to a list of 340 podcasters and bloggers, promoting their musicians.

    Good try, gang.

    Look, a lot has already been said about blogger outreach by better minds than mine.

    Here’s where this campaign really fell flat.

    First, please, please, please if you’re going to do outreach, at least BCC your list. I’d actually prefer that you “go pro” and use a mailing list service like Blue Sky Factory to manage your mailings, so that you have comprehensive blacklist and other filtering at your fingertips. On those occasions when I need to do outreach, I set up a segmentation that says, “Never, ever send this email to the same address twice”.

    Second, put an obvious, functional opt-out in the email.

    Third, if you’re going to pitch me, PITCH me. Show me why you deserve an ounce of my time or attention. The email I got had a relatively decent subject line, but a really poor payload. This company wants to promote their musicians to me. Fine and good, I love promoting musicians (like Rich Palmer, Matthew Ebel, Anji Bee, Rebecca Loebe, Black Lab, Natalie Gelman, Rayko KRB, and countless others) and I love hearing new, independent music, but the pitch in this message was about as exciting as getting my grocery bill via email, which is to say not at all. (perhaps you have exciting groceries? I do not)

    What would make an effective pitch to me? Well, you could send me a link to an MP3 ( <= free MP3! ) so that I could hear what you have to offer – that’d be a start. Tell me WHY your musicians are so good, and whether or not musicians like to be compared to others, tell me at least who they kind of sound like – for example, Matthew Ebel sounds like the love child of Billy Joel and Ben Folds with a dash of William Shatner from time to time, and an ounce or two of John Mayer.

    Marketing music is difficult under the best circumstances, and lord knows I’ve made more than my share of missteps. At least maybe this list of basics will help music marketers who WANT to do outreach be a little more effective.

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